In this week’s blog we are thinking about putting the welfare of others before our own. This is something that I, personally, think we are beginning to lose in wider society. Maybe we have been losing it for a long time.
This has all sorts of implications, and it is not just relevant to men, but I think our men’s groups are a good place to start.
I was chatting to a guy recently who genuinely wants to get a men’s group started in his local area. He has quite a few mates, and there are other men in his church too, but he kept on telling me how busy he was. I mean he didn’t just say it once, he said it 3 or 4 times in our conversation.
Now I know how busy we all are. I have a child with developmental delay so for the past six years I have been a dad to a constant 2-year-old. Life is busy, it is hard and there are times when we just want to make it as easy as possible for ourselves. That’s why duvets are such a good invention, a great place to hide. That pull to make life easier is, I think, something we can all relate to, at least at various times in our lives.
But here’s the thing, we do need to invest in others too. We need to put the welfare of others before our own and I think organising men’s groups is a great way to do this.
As I have got a bit older, I am discovering a strong desire within to be a bit of a sage – not the herb bush kind, more of the wiser, older man type. I think this is a natural progression for a lot of us. I think I have said this before, we live in a fatherless epidemic and as men we are suffering because of that. We need to find ways to become better husbands, better fathers, friends, colleagues, neighbours etc and we need to help our mates to do the same.
I recently read in Becoming A King the following epitaph and I found myself really hoping that this will be something those who I hold dear will be able to say of me after I am gone:
He lived and led with wisdom, vulnerability, and courage. He shaped the world for good and left a lasting legacy. He loved well and loved deeply from a sincere heart. And he finished strong.
But I know for sure this will never be said of me if I am not part of a band of brothers, a men’s group. I need to put myself in situations that require me to invest in others and where others can invest in me too. This is so important; it is vital for our families and for the society in which we live—to say we are too busy for this is to do a disservice to ourselves and to everyone around us.
Here’s my #TopTip for this week, September is such a good month for new beginnings. We come out of the summer holidays and if we have kids they go back to school. We start thinking about new projects or adult courses etc. So, why not get the boys together and have a fire-pit or a BBQ and chat about the areas of life that you need help in, or that you could help them in. Start investing in each other, putting the welfare of those around you first. Remember we all reproduce what we are, you could be the start of a movement of men who lead your mates to Jesus, mostly because your mates see the difference in you all.
